An unstoppable force meets an unmovable object

That skirt

I have a golden skirt that looks like it is made from royal draperies in a period drama set in Versailles. But when I wear it, I only get compliments so I thought it would be perfect to go to the launch of an exhibition of a famous designer at the Design Museum last week. How wrong I was…
Shy as I am, I quickly slipped in a corner upon arrival. The designer (whose name I will keep quiet, you’ll understand why later) was half way through a long monologue, with his court at his feet, so I didn’t want to draw attention to myself. My plan was going well, until the man, and his huge moustache, turned, saw me and made a beeline towards me. I felt the crimson cheeks just waiting to happen…
He stopped in front of me, and declared very loud “I looooove your skirt”. So I timidly mumbled “thank you”, not knowing where to look. The whole room was amused. He then asked “what is it made of?” and I, because it is my opinion, said “oh, I don’t know, it looks a bit like a curtain, doesn’t it?”. What a mistake! He then went on, licking his lips and saying “well, curtains are made to be opened and I would love to see what is behind this particular one”. Before he could come any closer I inched out from the corner, but he just followed, saying “you know, I have a 6ft tall fountain pen at home.”
It’s going to be hard to wear that skirt again any time soon…

posted by The rat and the monkey @ 8:30:00 AM