An unstoppable force meets an unmovable object

Eine fantastische Stadt

Berlin rocks. It is full of tourist attractions that are absolutely terrible, punishing lazy travellers for their lack of research into the more underground and far cooler destinations it has to offer. Of course, we arrived somewhat as part of that despicable group ourselves...

So we started with the TV tower in Alexanderplatz. We queued for about 10 minutes before realising that it cost 8 euros to get in. Just for a view! We quickly amended our ways and fled from this tourist trap. Unfortunately our escape took us to yet another place on the map of clichés: Checkpoint Charlie. Again we were faced with the extortionate 9-euro entrance fee, but this time the hail outside forced us inside. We just found an endless series of rooms placarded with giant photocopies from some very poorly illustrated book. Very disappointing. And the climax, overlooking the actual checkpoint, teaches you that what you are looking is in fact a replica and not the real checkpoint at all! What a rip-off...

We continued our touristic tour at the Reichstag, witnessing the incredible dome and vortex that Norman Foster has plonked on top it. But again, what a waste of a good opportunity! It’s just a ramp, leading nowhere and not giving any insight into the building itself, collecting nothing but useless tourist footfall.

But then we had an epiphany, of which the Holocaust memorial was just the first part. This is a haunting place, with blocks of stone that rise gradually so that before you know it you are surrounded by tall, dark walls that close in on you and make you feel lost, alone, scared and disorientated, just like the holocaust victims must have felt. In fact it was almost like being on a boat, rocked by an unpredictable sea that might just swallow you at any moment. The memorial led us to the Jewish Museum, where the same architect, Daniel Liebeskind, has created an even bigger, more dramatic and much more haunting place. Inside, there was an exhibition called falling leaves, which still sends a shiver down my spine even now, a month later. It was a room full of pieces of metal into which primitive faces had been carved, and visitors were encouraged to walk on them. The ensuing noise, made more intense by the narrow and very high room, was very disturbing. And it was made only worse by the anguished look on the simple pieces of metal below our feet.

Outside, we meditated on what we had just seen by watching a man play a row of crystal glasses with just a wet finger. The ghostly music was perfect for our mood. Finally we were witnessing a part of Berlin that resulted in a different emotion to the outrage we had felt at being ripped off all of the time.

Then, to lift our spirits (we were on holiday after all), we went for a quick bite in OrianenburgStrasse, in a great little Turkish place of which there are many. It made a nice change to the endless meals of sausages that we had been treated to previously. We even thought that we could fool the German system by ordering a club sandwich once, but that came with a sausage in a cocktail stick on top of the bread wedges!

Feeling much better, we carried on the Pergamon, where we saw the amazing walls of Nebuchadnezzer’s Babylon. Just breathtaking! There was a moment of slight embarassement when I forgot I was wearing an audio guide and shouted to Steve ‘Pigs, slaughtered!’ to point out how funny the voice was, but when everyone turned around and looked at me in horror, I quickly learned to hold my tongue...

We ended the day with a head massage from a man on a market, who sold us a sort of spidery whisk, promising that we would ‘have exotic experiences with this’, and ‘Spa Knipe’: a well-earned foot bath and massage as invented by Krusty...

There was much, much more. From seeing a piece of the moon in the Science Museum to Krusty being chatted up by a transexual leather fetishist in the bathroom of the uber trendy Bangaluu club, we had an absolutely fantastic time.

And now I leave to go on a longer trip to Shanghai. 2007 really has been the year of interesting travels. Here's to keeping it up in 2008!

Here are some photos... There are many more, let me know if you want to see them and I'll send you a link to the slide show.

posted by The rat and the monkey @ 7:37:00 AM